Last September, the headaches started. So I went to the doctor. He made a note in my file that it was stress. I believed him. But the headaches didn’t get better.
The first doctor retired. I went to a new doctor. She encouraged me to get counseling. She recommended a topical pain reliever. She scheduled specialist appointments that were scheduled 11 and 13 months out respectively, their soonest openings. She prescribed an anti-depressant and encouraged me to find a less stressful line of work.
The headaches got worse.
I went to the dentist. I went to the eye doctor. I waited for the neurology and ENT appointments. They are still months out.
Finally, I asked my daughter’s pediatrician for a referral. I couldn’t live like this anymore.
Yesterday, I saw a new doctor. She prescribed a medication for headaches. Maybe it is stress, she said, but we still needed to treat the headaches. Let’s get a blood test and a brain scan. Let’s see each other again in one month.
Okay, one month. When you’ve had a headache for 373 of the past 390 days, one month doesn’t feel like very long.
To anyone living with a chronic illness that impacts your life, I am sorry that I didn’t understand until I became one of you. Didn’t understand how you lose hope that you will get better. Didn’t understand how it slices away pieces of you. Didn’t understand how you move through the world feeling jealous of your past self that she didn’t appreciate all she had. Didn’t understand how it makes you angry.
I hope that, if you don’t understand what I’m talking about, that you never do.
+ Verdict is in: Greatest comforter ever made. Not too hot; never fight for covers again.
+ Should women take their whole selves to the office?
+ These velvet Mary Janes from Loeffler make my heart flutter.
+ To get sick less often, use a humidifier. This one is the easiest to clean.
+ Track pants that look like work pants? I’m sold.
+ New studies on estrogen therapy and perimenopause explained.
+ Lands’ End has the Boden look for less with this turtleneck.
+ This body exfoliating glove is perfect for dry winter skin.
+ This veggie sandwichhas all the fall flavors.
+ Dress up work heels for a date or holiday party with these shoe clips.
+ Read this Jo Piazza book on a recent flight: 8.5/10. It was an easy, mindless read.
+ This nighttime stretching routine will help you fall asleep.
+ This week, I want to talk about the coolest fact you’ve ever learned. Like the one that blew your mind. The one you told people at parties. Your “Roman Empire” fact.
Mine? The Tidal Bulge. I heard Neil deGrasse Tyson explain it over a year ago, and I still think about it all the time. Hint: Everything you “know” about the tide is wrong.
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I LOVE The Jumble so so so much. I hope the medication you got helps you get to the upcoming appt. and that you can find the source of the the headaches. Thanks you for still putting out blog posts even when you are in pain and I am sure exhausted. I cannot think of a cool fact worthy of sharing…looking forward to others.
I’m very tempted by this comforter. How are you handling washing it?
I have only read your opening so far, but I must post. You and I are the same age, so I’ve been asking my female relatives about perimenopause and menopause. Three of my aunts who are sisters had migrane headaches starting in peri. One one still has them after reaching menopause. I’m not trying to diagnose you, of course, but I want to put this on your radar in case it has not been considered by a doctor as a cause of your headaches yet.
I’m also a big fan of going to a major medical center like Mayo Clinic when you’re not getting acceptable answers from your local physicians.
Raises hand over here to say my migraines have become much more frequent in this phase of life. To be fair, the world HAS also become a lot more stressful in this same period AND I was diagnosed with an autoimmune disease, so who knows…
Was going to come on to say my gyn also said headaches/migraines are impacted by changing hormone levels in perimenopause.
Hands up here too – I started getting AWFUL headaches 3-4 days a week with perimenopause. Sounds like you’ve covered a lot in conversation with doctors but just in case that hasn’t come up…
Magnesium has made a huge difference for me. The headaches aren’t totally gone but they are now clustered around the start of my cycle instead of all month long.
Here’s my fact: owls have crazy long legs. Enjoy the Google image search . . . !
I sincerely enjoyed this!
Team migraines in peri over here. I went from migraines once every couple months to having one more days than not during the week. My doctor put me on a daily med and I’m back to one every couple of months.
I am not yet fully in peri but I had migraine headaches start, the first few days of my period. Intense enough that I had to call in sick several times. My PCP said it’s related to hormones and gave me meds (sertaline) that I take 3 days before the period starts and through it. Hugs difference! Headaches are not fully gone but now are manageable with some OTC painkillers instead of being debilitating. I have been looking forward to the graceful part of growing older, not this $hit.
Hi – I had chronic daily headache for about 10 years. It really limited my life in most of my 20s. I have been on almost a dozen medications and did headache Botox and a topical muscle relaxant. Acupuncture helped some, so did EMDR. What finally cracked it was the diet in the book “Heal Your Headache” along with cutting caffeine 100%, which is part of the process in the book. I hope this helps!
I don’t know if this counts as a coolest fact ever, but I love the fact that you can’t hum with your nose plugged. Random body facts are always fun.
OH MY GOD, you can’t! (Of course I tried it.)
Haha, why did I immediately have to try this? And nope, no humming!
I had a near daily headache for a year in my late 20s. It was stress + certain foods. For me some of the foods are sour cream (instant), yogurt, tomatoes (if I eat a lot), red dyes and chocolate. Sometimes these foods are fine but I think of it like bricks — if I have too much stress and I eat these, migraine. It was the weirdest thing. I still get headaches but nowhere as much now. I am so sorry you are going through this and hope you get the help you need to figure it out.
This is the first time I have ever offered any medical-type advice on the internet, but I had a very similar headache experience post-partum. I never had headaches before having a baby. I wasn’t gas lit as much, but I went through several migraine medicines with no luck. After a lot of trial and error and several years, I finally figured out I have to drink a lot of water (45+ oz) within the first 90 minutes of being awake. Doing that prevents the migraines. I have no idea if this will help you, but it’s easy to try. I am so sorry you’re dealing with this! I hope you get relief.
I have a lot of sympathy for a headache that lasts forever. When I was recovering from COVID the first time, in 2022, I had a headache that lasted from the Fourth of July to Labor Day. I also had a drooping eyelid. The combination led the doctor to doing a CT scan to see if I had suffered a small stroke. The answer was no, I was just taking a long time to recover.
I had had migraines from college until just before I turned 50. They definitely got worse during peri. Getting through to the other side led them to mostly go away, same as for the aunts on both sides of my family who also suffered from them.
“To anyone living with a chronic illness that impacts your life, I am sorry that I didn’t understand until I became one of you. Didn’t understand how you lose hope that you will get better. Didn’t understand how it slices away pieces of you.”
This is so spot-on. Chronic illnesses take away so much- yes, I’ve learned to manage and grown through the process. But there are still so many days when I just feel like a vestige of my former self.
I’m so sorry you’re struggling.
My random fact is simply daring you to Google image search “toddler skull teeth.” It’s wild – our permanent teeth develop after birth and are just sitting in the skull ready to push out the baby teeth eventually, and it looks TERRIFYING.
Okay you win. This is freaky!
So sorry you are dealing with headaches! I had chronic headaches in my 20s, and a combination of PT + trigger point injections/dry needling cured me. I didn’t see this on the list of treatments you are considering, so wanted to share in case it’s helpful! This book is a good resource to start with: https://www.amazon.com/Trigger-Point-Therapy-Headaches-Migraines/dp/1572245255.
This isn’t going to be a new fact for anyone, but do you ever really think about the fact that some animals hibernate through winter?? If I hadn’t learned that as a child there’s no way I would ever believe it as an adult.
Can you imagine a multi-month nap??
I am in my first trimester and watched a documentary with my toddler recently where a pregnant bear hibernated for six months. That was the first time it really hit me! Imagine if we could just sleep through the majority of pregnancy and our bodies could focus on nourishing our babies rather than day to day life!
The tidal bulge truly shocked me and I immediately made everyone in my family watch it. My fun fact is that a huge percentage of white sand on beaches is actually parrotfish poop. https://manoa.hawaii.edu/exploringourfluidearth/physical/coastal-interactions/beaches-and-sand/weird-science-parrotfish-and-sand
So sorry about the chronic pain… the not knowing is the worst, and it’s so emotionally and physically draining.
I will share that while I still have hormonal headaches, I have eliminated a good number of mine through Botox to the jaw which minimizes my clenching of the jaw during sleep. In
Unfortunately, I also have headaches (all kinds) on a regular basis and I’ve had them for most of my life. I’ve suffered from migraines on and off for decades. Seeing a neurologist was instrumental in learning how to manage the headaches (because they may never go awaycompletely), and finding a medication to treat migraines changed my life. I hope you find a treatment plan that works for you. Don’t stop asking for help until you do.
I recently learned that that there are only 8 species of bear in the world!
I’m so sorry you are in pain. Chronic pain and illness get you down. I hope you can get some answers soon.
My cool fact is about the way I experience language- it’s called ticker tape synesthesia. I have subtitles running in my brain when I think or talk, or other people talk. Apparently a very strong connection in the brain between auditory and written language. I only found out that it has a name recently!
When I was a political consultant, I would have migraines basically every day of the entire on year. I took migraine medication and I laid down for 15 to 30 minutes every day or took a call laying down with this on: https://www.amazon.com/Migraine-Qnoon-Headache-Products-Hangover/dp/B0CQXMWQH9/ref=sr_1_1_sspa?crid=17J1HYGCBRMLD&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.vyGZfX6XmWTv0JNuxS5wco26mqeKYvtjDLrNlD02boIPnwW4LXKpPG_vxCludeuHmCjpTSquc7NsXjydeCXxLSvZP5Cve5nl7HLOd3vioSqWZORgAoxxj1kuIyE75D8L8AFYG-PsKn1mOHZOl06-UM88Fi4m32X1ufnKt0oCKXvXMD9eCl1nj8ZQNIR01Po0GDI137TKIbvf1tUYdHcvrOUfSNA4Es0la_DD9kWmMJ5Zcq1rbaxhnNkH0LAKRK-zi25bPWCRri-sMMWuGtjLXeI6NEcxSC_1VATPEKap9-8.yzrZFEW807SqOYz_PebGvPkUHeZ66dzXu84tisIhUFs&dib_tag=se&keywords=stress%2Brelief%2Bfor%2Bmigraines&qid=1761750304&sprefix=migraine%2Bre&sr=8-1-spons&sp_csd=d2lkZ2V0TmFtZT1zcF9hdGY&th=1
And yeah, eventually I quit my job.
I have chronic migraine disorder and tried all of the typical meds. What finally worked for me was Botox. It was seriously a miracle for someone with headaches almost every day. Luckily my insurance covers it. I’ve also found Qulipta helpful and I have a rotation of ice hats from Amazon.
My favorite random cool fact:
Sharks have existed for longer than the rings of Saturn.
Sharks have been around for about 400 million years, while the rings of Saturn have been around for approximately 100 million years.
And my sympathies on the headaches. It’s awful having a chronic medical problem. I’m trying to get a diagnosis for symptoms that have been plaguing me for 2+ years. Our healthcare system does not do a great job at helping figure out medical mysteries. I hope you get some answers and relief very soon.
I think the neurologist will likely have the best answers and treatment for your headaches — I also think that it might be hormone-related for you and can say my own migraines have gotten way worse postpartum/worsen with my cycle. I just have to say that I hate how your new doctor prescribed an antidepressant and not, you know, triptans or other meds to address headache. That really pisses me off for you. OBVIOUSLY it’s just that you’re a crazy woman, not that you likely have a medical condition! *SAID IN DEEP SARCASM*
At first, I thought they were right. Because my mental health was worse. But after four months, I was like, guys, I don’t think that’s all of it, and they were just immovable.
I am so sorry to hear about your headaches. I started getting migraines several years ago. I am really sensitive to side effects of medications, so the preventative meds didn’t work for me. I take magnesium and riboflavin daily and they have noticeably decreased my migraines. Now I mostly just get them around my cycle. Wishing you all the best – hope you get relief soon!
Just coming to say yes to magnesium and riboflavin. I saw an ENT last week about the killer migraines, and she recommended those two supplements, plus CoEnzyme Q10 as a third one. She cautioned that it may take up to three months to notice a difference, though. I can’t get an appointment with a headache specialist or a neurologist for at least a year, which is a bummer, but at least I have the baby-steps version of something to do in the meantime.
For the poster who recommended Mayo: I spent three years seeing specialists there. I know a lot of things about a debilitating chronic condition that I *don’t* have, but no one can tell me what I actually *do* have (migraines were not what I was seen for). Mayo is really useful for seeing a variety of doctors and having a wide range of tests done in one place and usually over a period of just a few days. I’m one of the lucky ones who was treated there, but I still have no idea what’s wrong with me. (The MDs I saw ruled out brain tumors, cancer, and a variety of other unpleasant, so there’s that. . .) I’m not trying to discourage anyone, but it’s not easy to get in, even with your PCP’s referral, and you may not get the answers you’re desperate to have.
I’ve had headaches most of my adult life, and they got much worse in perimenopause. I tracked them, showed a pattern that coincided with weather systems, and the neurologist just rollerd her eyes, said drink more water and get a massage.
Now that I’m taking magnesium for menopause symptoms, and am on HRT, my migraines have gone from 3 out of 7 days to maybe once every 14 days and yeah, still linked to the weather but they are nowhere near as bad.
Can’t believe they rolled their eyes at the weather relationship. I live in a Denver suburb (east coast transplant) and I don’t know if it’s the altitude, dry air, or specific weather patterns, but there are SO MANY people here who get wicked headaches with major barometric pressure swings that I just don’t remember hearing about when I lived in the mid-Atlantic.
Because I am narwhal obsessed: Some male narwhals can have 2 horns (versus the usual one), and many female narwhals have a short horn (though they don’t participate in mating rituals).
I am so sorry about the mysterious health issues and hope that you find a resolution.
On a brighter note…did you know that out of thousands of snakebites in the USA per year, on average only about 5 people die of them? Even venomous snakebites are almost always either “dry” (no venom actually injected), insufficient to kill someone, or treatable with antivenom if help is promptly sought! [Source: this fascinating book – https://www.amazon.com/Americas-Snake-Rise-Timber-Rattlesnake/dp/022604064X%5D
Did you know that of the 8 colonels from Virginia in the U.S. Army in 1861, Robert E Lee was the only one to join the Confederate Army? [Source: this illuminating book – https://www.amazon.com/Robert-Lee-Me-Southerners-Reckoning/dp/1250239265%5D
I might have missed your response but have you tried the chiropractor? We’re going through the same thing with my husband. The only treatment that slightly helps, is the chiro. Disclaimer, the chiro is a UFC/boxing/sports medicine guy and I truly believe they listen to the body more than, I hate to say it, a “regular chiro”. food for thought.
I have, it lessens, but does not fix. It’s the only thing that really helps. Mine is a former college athlete similar mode of thinking to yours, I bet.
I also recently read — and loved — that Jo Piazza book! Read it on the train and was really drawn in by the story
Unsolicited advice – when you go to the neurologist or a new doctor – if your medical records were forwarded, ask them what the doctor said.
I had fibroids. Early on I was talking to the doctor about how things got worse. I went to a different doctor who listened to me and then looked at my records and looked at my chart and looked at me confused and showed me what was written. It was a three year out of date description. I left crying I was so mad.
It took a long while to get everything sorted out. I used to be the person that would watch a medication ad list all the side effects and be “why would anyone even take that.” Now I’m the kind of person who watches a medication ad with all the side effects and I know why you would choose to take that chance.
Best of luck to you.
Try sumatriptan. It was the only thing that took away my migraines.
That’s what they gave me. It seems to be helping.
Plus one for this. Pills never worked as well for me though. I prefer the shot (sometimes you can get a self-administered version) or the nasal spray, which stings like crazy is by far the fastest acting.
I’m so sorry about your headaches. I had terrible headaches until I started hormone replacement therapy in menopause. Years ago, I figured out that aspartame gives me terrible headaches. Diet Coke was a particular offender. Avoiding aspartame is hugely helpful for me. Hope you find a diagnosis of the cause and a solution!
My brain is full of useless knowledge (which is why I love trivia games), so here are some fun, useless facts:
1. There are 4 countries whose national anthems have no words – Spain, Bosnia, Kosovo, and San Marino.
2. The last letter added to the English language was ‘j’.
3. Like fingerprints, every human has a distinct tongue print.
4. The Atlantic Ocean is saltier than the Pacific Ocean.
5. Animals can be allergic to human dander.