The Edition: No. 51

There is more than one way to burn a book. And the world is full of people running about with lit matches. ― Ray Bradbury

Shifted. You don’t need a breakthrough, you need a micro-shift to succeed.

Tuckered Out. Tuckernuck is having a 20%-off sale. I’m loving this Barbour jacket and this $58 blouse that’s perfect to wear under sweaters.

Shattered. He gave her a $100,000 engagement ring. They broke up. Then, it got messy.

Wrapped. This $99 wool skirt from & Other Stories is versatile, not basic.

Passed Over. What to do when your co-worker gets the promotion you believe you deserved.

Cozied. Last week, we talked about ‘desk sweaters.’ This Madewell is my new favorite one.

Examined. Every ingredient in your Pumpkin Spice Latte explained.

Styled. Sweater + Necklace + Printed Skirt = Feminine Fall Outfit.

Connected. How to build more meaningful relationships, and how to be better at parties.

Sparkled. This M.A.C. palette is every fall eyeshadow color you need.

I love a good jacket.  I can’t help it.  A basic outfit can become a stunner with the right jacket.  And this $39 sueded knit moto jacket from Old Navy is the right jacket.  This green is fantastic, but the other six colors, including a wonderful wine-hue, might be even better.

I also like this affordable bomber jacket and this twill field jacket.  They also have the same moto jacket in a scuba fabric.  And, because it’s Old Navy, the majority of these pieces are available in plus-sizes.

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  1. Liz says:

    I have that Old Navy jacket in gray, and I love it! I saw it on a previous post, and it’s actually what I use as my “desk sweater”. Looks cute, and is totally machine washable – amazing value for the price.

    October 1, 2018/Reply
  2. Lily says:

    Just wanted to share that I bought the Old Navy moto jacket in the emerald color a few weeks ago, and was well worth it. Looks much more expensive in person, and their tall size fits perfectly if you have longer arms like me.

    October 1, 2018/Reply
    • Jo says:

      Probably too late for y’all to see this, but for anyone who owns the Old Navy jacket – did y’all have trouble with the color bleeding? I noticed a number of reviews complained about that, but none of them followed up to say if it bled post-first wash.

      October 2, 2018/Reply
      • Belle says:

        I’m not sure why anyone would be washing it. But I can see wear the color would rub off on a car seat or a lighter color purse though. That sometimes happens with my jeans, and it’s so annoying.

        October 2, 2018/Reply
        • Jo says:


          October 3, 2018/Reply
  3. Monica T says:

    Love that article about building relationships. I attended a women’s networking event last week and was completely put off by her advice about relationship building. It was all based on the APPEARANCE of caring about the other person. Of course, her entire spiel about building a personal brand was about appearances so this shouldn’t have been surprising, but still. I can’t overstate how much being genuinely interested in people, curious about their lives and thoughts and open about your own feelings can make a lasting impact with others. I don’t do it to sell them something (because I don’t sell things), I just can’t help it. That said, I can’t force it with people I really dislike, which maybe would be the skill to have.

    Also, PSL…buuurrrrn.

    October 1, 2018/Reply
    • Crystal says:

      Monica — For me, this was a big takeaway from the book Quiet (about introverts). We aren’t going to build our networks by going to parties/events and working the room. We’re going stand at a cocktail table or sit on a couch and talk in depth with someone and take the time to really get to know them.
      That’s valuable. I let go of trying to be the “networker” some of my friends and colleagues are, and I do it my own way — which as you said, relates to having a genuine interest in other human beings’ lives (and not investing the time in those for whom I can’t build that connection).

      October 1, 2018/Reply
      • Monica T says:

        I have been wanting to read that book, now I have a good reason! I’ve always identified as an introvert, but lately people keep telling me they think I’m extroverted. The thing they don’t understand is that not all introverts are shy, or even always quiet. Around friends I can be downright boisterous, and when I’m in the right mood I can be loquacious. And I love talking to people and hearing their stories. Talking about them is an excellent way to avoid talking about myself after all.

        October 1, 2018/Reply
    • Belle says:

      I can find almost anything interesting if someone is passionate about it. When I was lobbying, I once had an hour conversation about fly-tying. I don’t fish, but he was so into it, made it easy. Also, just taking a genuine interest in people’s children is a really easy thing to do, because kids are usually up to something that is at least nostalgic.

      October 1, 2018/Reply
    • Stephanie says:

      I admittedly suck at networking, and the advice to be interested in other people is very true, but I find it results in me playing 20 questions with people, with no reciprocation and sometimes not even very much effort on their part. It’s exhausting and while it’s likely effective, I hate it. I feel like advice like this may make you successful, but you’re not necessarily going to enjoy it if you would rather focus on the couple of people you have an actual connection with, or who are just livelier or more funny.

      October 2, 2018/Reply
  4. MsmarymarY says:

    This is random but I think this group will appreciate it. Last week I realized my desk sweater had several holes in the elbow and arm. I’m not going to give holey clothes to charity, so I tossed it in the trash. It was an Old Navy sweater and had lived a decent life. In the morning, I found that the cleaning crew had fished it out of the trash and left it on my chair! I had been out most of the day so there was very little in my trash. I appreciated the thought but I threw it away again with a post-it that said TRASH.

    October 1, 2018/Reply
  5. Betsy says:

    That ring story! It’s sadly unsurprising and surely I wasn’t the only person who could immediately imagine people she knows on both sides of that scenario?

    October 1, 2018/Reply
  6. Jules says:

    I….. found that “be better at parties” article…. confusing.

    I mean, it’s full of information. But… (I feel bad about saying this)…. don’t people already know this? It feels like it was written for someone who’s never been to a party. Why’s it on New York Times? It feels like some reddit tips or something.
    Tips like don’t talk about religion, or don’t ask if a woman is pregnant, or make appropriate eye contact, or ask meaningful questions…. is like… . I learned this in 6th grade…? I’m really confused. Have parties changed a lot or something?

    October 1, 2018/Reply
    • Belle says:

      No, I’m terrible in groups. It wasn’t “new” information per se, but it’s always helpful for me to read it again. And no, there are a lot of people who don’t know that you shouldn’t talk about religion at parties. When I first moved West, I was asked if I had accepted Jesus as my Savior at a kid’s birthday party.

      October 1, 2018/Reply
      • Juls says:

        Omg haha, yes there are always going to be…. interesting folks at parties who seem to always have their foot in their mouths!

        October 1, 2018/Reply
    • MonicA T says:

      I shared this article with a coworker because while I suffer from mild social anxiety around large groups, she feels that way at nearly every social gathering. She analyzes her every word and gesture to the point of making herself awkward and then is so paralyzed by fear of saying or doing the wrong thing that she basically runs out the door as soon as she feels like she has fulfilled her obligation. These kind of articles are helpful for people who suffer from anxiety but want to do better. As the article says, having a list of topics to discuss or knowing what other people expect of you can help calm the anxiety so you can just be yourself, it’s like a security blanket.

      Also not all of us had the social experiences that others enjoyed, and that as a successful adult you have to suddenly know how to do. People from different socioeconomic or cultural backgrounds can always use a cheat sheet on what is expected in the mainstream culture.

      October 2, 2018/Reply