After watching the Green Bay Packers save me from a week of boyfriend-sulking with a victory in the NFC Wild Card game, I clicked over to the Golden Globes just in time to see a tipsy Goldie Hawn trying to read a teleprompter sans glasses. Ah, the Globes, the only award show where the nominations can be bought, but the cocktails are free.
I know I say this every year (cue broken record), but the dresses this year were a snoozefest. It took me hours just to locate a few that I wanted to talk about. And even then, I was like, “Can we just skip it?” So if this post feels a little like the half-dead dinner conversation at Aunt Helen’s 80th birthday party, you’ll understand why. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go take a nap. So sleepy. (As usual, all photos are borrowed from at JustJared, purveyor of celebrity gossip.)
Kristin Wiig in ???
Yellow was a big trend at this year’s Globes, but it didn’t go over as well as some ladies were hoping…
Reese Witherspoon in Atelier Versace
When 2017 Reese makes a valiant effort to compete with 2007 Reese and fails.
Kerry Washington in Dolce & Gabbana
If Wednesday Adams lost a bet, and was forced to wear yellow…
Viola Davis in Michael Kors
And this, ladies, is how we wear yellow. #fresh
Sofia Vergara in Zuhair Murad
If Elie Saab made a tribute to Princess Leia’s metal bikini in Return of the Jedi.
Sienna Miller in Michael Kors
A cut-out frock with Grandma’s pearls, a bad spray tan, and a gym ponytail; the look on Sienna’s face really says it all.
Michelle Williams in Louis Vuitton
The dress is pretty, the choker is massively on-trend, why am I so bored?
Elsa Pataky in Zuhair Murad
A lot of women tried to do the ‘naked’ dress, only Elsa made it work. (How has this woman had three children?)
Emma Stone in Valentino
On anyone else, this dress would look like a Dream Glow Barbie flashback, but on Emma, the star spangled frock totally works.
And now, for Belle’s Worst Dressed…
Nicole Kidman in Alexander McQueen
It’s like Princess Elsa got caught in front of a space heater and her dress melted from her body. (Please, no Wicked Witch of the West jokes about melting, they’re too easy.)
When you want to pay homage to Madonna’s ‘Like a Virgin’ look, but accidentally leave your Boy Toy belt at home.
And now for my Best Dressed pick…
Kristen Bell in Jenny Packham
I didn’t know that Jenny Packham, Queen of the Pastel, Pleated Chiffon, even made black dresses. But, boy, does she make black dresses. Also, take note, this is how you complete an entire look. The nude lip, smokey eye, black nails, modern-waves, and statement bracelet all just work. I think after my nap, I’ll watch a few episodes of Veronica Mars.