The Eight: October 28, 2016

Oct 28, 2016

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1) How to empathize without stealing the spotlight. (The Everygirl)

2) Fair Isle sweaters can be preppy and classic or trendy and modern, dealer’s choice.

3) Tips on looking the part for a “big-deal job” without going broke. (The Cut)

4) This B-low Wrap Belt is perfect with sweater dresses or over blazers.  This black knotted WHBM belt is pretty slick.

5) Is it ever okay to wear black to a wedding? (Vogue)

6) These Tory Burch Leyla flats in burgundy are total showstoppers.

7) Pushing these buttons might make you feel better, but…(NYT)

8) This Climawear Aim High tank is great for the gym.  I also like their Rock the Core long sleeve.

Bonus: You’re definitely not throwing away your beauty tools often enough. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go get a trash bag. (Refinery29)

*image found here.

Workday Reading

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  1. Allison says:

    Thanks for sharing the article about empathy. My dad is a cancer survivor, he was diagnosed when I was in elementary school and continued to have complications and emergency procedures through my years in college. When I was upset and mentioned it to my college friends they would just stare at me and fumble through an “I’m sorry”. I appreciate that they listened to me and didn’t compare it to their own experiences, but I could tell how awkward they felt. I reached out a to an old friend who has known me my whole life thinking that she would be a source of consolation, and she replied with, “It makes me feel uncomfortable that you are telling me this, I don’t know how to help you.” Needless to say I stopped interacting with her, and when her mom died suddenly of breast cancer two years ago I felt terribly guilty for not being there for her, but the relationship was gone. (Of course I reached out and offered condolences.) I had learned that the college friends that at least showed up and listened, even if they didn’t have the perfect thing to say, where the friends I’d have for life.

    • SSC says:

      When I miscarried my first pregnancy, I found that a lot of people struggled with finding the right words (particularly when they’d been excited about the pregnancy — the abruptness of it all was tough). The most empathetic response I got was from my husband’s cousin, who sent a simple text: “I love you, S.” She acknowledged what I was going through and let me know she was there for me without either of us having to reach for the right thing to say.

      I can’t imagine dealing with a response along the lines of “it makes me feel uncomfortable that you are telling me this.” Oof.

  2. Cait says:

    That WHBM off the shoulder fair isle… I die! I want to wear it every day November-February.

  3. Shannon says:

    I straight-up cringed through the Vogue article. I don’t consider myself a torch-wielding peasant or anything, but that writer REALLY wanted everyone to know how wealthy and important and pedigreed she was and how everyone around her was so rich they could hardly stand it. Yes, even by the posh standards of Vogue. Ugh.

    • Kate says:

      Agreed! It read like a parody.

      • Kate says:

        And as a regular ol’, middle class American I would have appreciated an article actually discussing that question. I always try to avoid black at weddings myself. My husband’s only suit is black but I make him wear bright or light shirts and ties with it. Black is still the color of funerals in the U.S. and I hate that so many people wear it to weddings.

      • Belle says:

        Interesting you brought this up. I looked at the name of the writer and instantly spotted the problem. The Thurn und Taxis family are German aristocrats, I believe the authors actually title is Princess. So an odd choice to write the article for sure, but it’s a topic that’s come up on the blog before, so I thought it worth mentioning.

    • Lindsey says:

      Agreed. Like really….we’re going to take advice on whether or not it’s okay to wear black to a wedding from someone who is deciding between pieces of vintage Chanel. I’m sorry, not my favorite article and definitely not advice I can remotely relate to.

      • Shannon says:

        What was hilarious to me is that Snooty McRichenstein never even answered the question. She just name-dropped in circles for paragraph after paragraph.

        And when there was a photo, it was of a woman wearing what appeared to be Big Bird around her waist, with her bra all hanging out. Like, is that the author’s idea of a wedding appropriate outfit?

        Anyways, I cross-posted in to my FB and it’s been amazing to read all my friends’ snark.

        • JNick says:

          +1 to all of the above above on the insanity of the Vogue piece, though actually feel sorry for the author; so many name droppings that I (in my plebeian ignorance?) couldn’t recognize or distinguish between various transatlantic designers and “friends.” Perhaps it’s an ostentatious attempt to impress someone, just not me–got bored after Googlings few names, abandoned the piece mid-read, chuckled internally, and went back to #WeinerProbe on Twitter.

    • Lindsay says:

      I didn’t even realize not wearing black to a wedding was a thing, even if it’s mostly in Europe. #pleb

  4. Anna says:

    On the beauty tools one. I just bought an exfoliating washcloth that’s kind of like loofah material. Found it at Target, think it’s this one: https://www.target.com/p/-/A-15024837. I don’t have laundry in my apartment to change out cotton washcloths often enough, and I was grossed out by all the little nooks and crannies icky things can hide in a loofah. This one does the job and then I can rinse it thoroughly and hang it to dry. Since it’s nylon, it dries super fast and doesn’t retain moisture.

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