The Edition: No. 94

Apr 24, 2019

“I am in love with Montana. For other states I have admiration, respect, recognition, even some affection, but with Montana it is love, and it’s difficult to analyze love when you’re in it.” — John Steinbeck

One. A video on how to deal with passive aggressive co-workers that will be too real for some of us.

Two. Grabbed to pair of $27 Zella leggings and this cool, athleisure cardigan at Nordstrom Rack. (I seriously cannot wait for session to end so I can go outside again.)

Three. Instagram may lost its signature look, and it may also stop counting likes.

Four. I wholeheartedly endorse this $40(!) bucket bag in both the blush and cognac. It perfectly blends relaxed and chic.

Five. The Wages of Being a Woman at Work.

Six. Nordstrom is awash is summer wrap dresses. This $59 Leith dress is my favorite.  I also bought the pink All in Favor dress for $49.

Seven. And I thought I was the last person who puts two spaces after a period.

Eight. $20 beard trimmer, or super-effective, pink-tax free bikini trimmer?  You decide.

Nine. How to deliver constructive feedback (this was surprisingly good advice).

Ten. Thinking about buying this lipstick red business suit and changing out the buttons.  Thoughts?

Eleven. I Spent $17k Freezing My Eggs and I Regret Every Penny.

Session may end as early as tomorrow.  My time in Montana is coming to a close and I am alternately wistful and devastated.  I was walking through the halls last week, at a speed just shy of dead run to coordinate some strategy on a bill, and as I was breezing through the cloakroom, all I could think was, “God, I love this s**t.”

It may have only been for five months.  But it was a great five months.  Even if I spent almost 50 days of it sick, and only got out from under the snow yesterday.  It was a great five months.

Workday Reading

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  1. Anna says:

    YASSSS! Team Two Spaces!!!!!!!!

    • Jess says:

      Yes! This is literally the first time that I have even heard that people don’t use two spaces. (age 37, stay at home, so I guess that might be why?!)

    • Shannon says:

      Please quit putting two spaces after sentences. Editors like me have to take them all out. Thanks!

  2. Hh says:

    $59 Leith dress link went to the NY Times article. :(. And I loved hearing about you back in your legislative element in Montana. Good for you on taking that leap to do it.

  3. Lindsey says:

    Two. Spaces.
    Thank you, law review.

    • A says:

      Team 2 spaces here too! Signed, only 32 but also a lawyer.

    • POMPOM says:

      I’m in the one space camp, but when I was writing for my law review, I just did a find and replace throughout the document to add the second space into my own work. It was so much easier than retraining myself, ha!

    • Crystal says:

      As lawyers, we typically cite everything at the end of sentences rather than in footnotes or endnotes, and the citations often include parentheticals that make the citations even lengthier. It clutters the text. IMO, using two spaces better offsets the sentences and citations and makes everything more readable.

  4. Sarah says:

    Is it… even possible to use a beard trimmer around the bikini line?? I’ve bought men’s stick razors for legs but I’ve never heard of this hack!

  5. Kate says:

    Montana needs you and people like you. Montana will miss you.

  6. Kate says:

    I recently wrote a paper so I could qualify for a professional certification and used the single space after punctuation that I was converted to in college (instructor’s preference). When I got my grade back, I was dinged by a reviewer for single-spaces! I actually had to protest my grade because there was no style guide and the grading rubric specifically stated that format shouldn’t be considered!

  7. LS says:

    Ugh the egg freezing article is too real. Thank you for posting. I’m debating right now whether to do it. I’m in a stable long-term relationship, but he’s ten years younger than me. He’s not ready for embryo-freezing which I completely understand – I wouldn’t have wanted to make that decision at his age. So planning to freeze my eggs, but keep reading stories of regret.

    • KD says:

      LS, I am in very similar situation with a BF 8 years younger. I preferred freezing my own eggs (rather than make embryos) in case our relationship didn’t progress. I did 2 rounds of egg freezing @ CCRM in Denver a year ago & 1.5 years ago. Highly recommend researching clinics thru SART website – they show success rates with pregnancies using frozen eggs. If you need to use the eggs later on, it’s good to know the clinic you choose (& where you pay soo much $!) has experience making babies from frozen eggs.

      Also read this article & promptly called my clinic freaking out about possibility of missing an invoice for storage. That was really tough to read about. Freezing eggs is a lot of time/ money/ emotional roller coaster – I felt a gut punch just reading this happened to her. Awful.

      The process was hard but I do have some peace of mind. BF moved in with me &we are planning engagement/ marriage this year – I think freezing eggs gave us a little breathing room to solidify our relationship. I turn 37 this summer so it’s getting really real that we need to start trying & it may be challenging. Best of luck to you!!

    • Lisa says:

      I’m currently pregnant with an embryo made from an egg I froze four years ago. So, so grateful I did it, as my fertility is just about gone now at nearly 41.

      I’m on a lot of message boards with women doing IVF at 40 and it’s just so much harder than in your mid-30s.

      I feel like the author had an unusually bad run of luck and perhaps some unfair expectations too. The most important thing is a) the best clinic/lab you can get (agree on SART scores) and b) accumulating at least 20 eggs if you are in your mid-30s or later. It takes a lot of eggs – and sometimes multiple rounds of freezing – to get to good embryos.

      Oh and my clinic practically chases me down to pay those annual storage fees. They make it pretty hard to forget.

      • Anna says:

        That’s so good to hear. I just found out I have a BRCA1 mutation, but I’m single, I want my ovaries out ASAP, but I also want my own children one day. For me, I think egg freezing is the only way to go. Fortunately, I’m blessed to have the health insurance and money to do it. Thanks for the comment, I’m encouraged!

      • Jenny says:

        I agree, I think this writer was unusually unlucky. That seems like a very bad break. She mostly regrets freezing her eggs because the eggs were lost/the money wasted, but she didn’t lose them due to something about the process of egg freezing. She lost them because of a clerical situation! I’m guessing that isn’t too common. (Also maybe a little surprised that she didn’t notice she wasn’t being billed for the egg storage?) But I’m glad she got pregnant, and that her story had a happy ending. I just don’t think most women considering freezing need to worry about this particular situation.

  8. JeSs says:

    How do the Z by Zella leggings compare to the regular Zellas? Those are my very favorite leggings.

    • Belle says:

      I notice only a small difference in the quality of the fabric; it’s negligible.

      • Anna says:

        I thought you’d said in the past that the regular Zella’s had dropped in quality, so are these comparable to the older ones or the new ones?

        • Belle says:

          They are slightly less good than the older ones, but at that price the reduction in quality is fine, at the full price, no.

  9. Katy says:

    State Department guidance requires two spaces after every period. Wonder if the it’s the same rule in the rest of the federal government.

  10. Kathleen H Lisson says:

    I know! I let go of my NY state assembly service 5 years ago and still sometimes miss it.
    Kathleen

  11. Lynn says:

    Two spaces is a tragedy. Welcome to the smallest hill I am willing to die on.

    The instagram stuff is interesting! I don’t have blood in this fight, but I do think it’s odd how social media spaces (facebook, insta, even Youtube) have been playing with ways to keep people from making money. I would be interested in knowing why they do that, because I always assumed that when people make money off these sites, a percentage goes to the company/host.

  12. CYNTHIA says:

    I love red, however I think that suit is sending a very domineering statement. I’d prefer you try a nice red dress that shows power but not domineering. Just my two cents.
    Oh, and obviously I’m in the 2 spaces corner!

    • Belle says:

      Yes, it would be terrible to project power in a red suit. I would be so much more acceptably feminine in a dress. This isn’t a conversation that would ever be had with a man.

    • Laura says:

      The suit is domineering? That’s……interesting. I can’t think of any suit that I would classify as “domineering” except if it had like, 5″ metal spikes on the shoulders or a machine gun stitched into the back……but then I would probably just call it tacky.

  13. Anna says:

    I’m curious as to what buttons you would change them?

  14. RR says:

    I really love the idea of the red suit BUT I do think the one you linked to doesn’t look super high quality.

    • EmilyD says:

      I agree. Also, for what it’s worth, when I try to change buttons I always wind up spending too much money and am never totally happy with the result. Maybe I’m doing it wrong.

      Two spaces all the way!

      Signed,

      An editor

  15. Caitlin says:

    I love the Z by Zella pocket leggings! Pocket leggings are such a game changer for both workouts and travel. It’s so much easier to shove my phone in one and a slim card wallet in the other (+ boarding pass or passport if flying)…

    After accidentally leaving my phone on a check-in counter in Cancun and not realizing until I was already through security, pockets are CRUCIAL. The pockets are surprisingly large and of course very stretchy.

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