Hey Belle — question for you:
I’ve been dating a guy and have recently started spending the night at his apartment from time to time. We haven’t reached the point where I can lay claim to a drawer or space to keep some things so I’ve been pondering the best way to carry essentials to and from his place while still being fashionable on whatever date has preceded it and not screaming “look I’m expecting to spend the night at the guy I’m dating’s house!” I’ve been using the same smallish Coach purse for non-work days for years, but I think I need to find an alternative I fit a few things like a hairbrush and pajamas etc. in.
Any thoughts? Also, any thoughts on what “essentials” are to bring with you if you might spend the night at a guy’s house so you don’t look like you’re on a walk of shame on your way home?
Many thanks, DCQ
First off, you shouldn’t need to bring pajamas. If you are a person who likes lingerie, you buy reasonably comfortable lingerie and wear it under your regular clothes. Then, you borrow one of his shirts to sleep in, maybe some gym shorts if it’s chilly.
I always slept in my boyfriend’s clothes, it was easier than packing my own and he thought it was adorable. Plus, this cuts down on things you need to bring.
As for the bag, this is why Rebecca Minkoff created the Morning After Bag. Not too big for every day, but big enough for date night. Yes, at $475, it’s a bit of an investment, but you can always wait for the Gilt Groupe sale and pick one up for 40-percent-off.
This bag is a similar size, but still appropriate for daytime. And you can pack a clutch in it, so if possible, you leave the bag in your/his car and just take the clutch into the restaurant.
As for what to pack in it, I consulted with Miss M and we decided upon these essentials: travel size face wash, small container of moisturizer, hairspray (or dry shampoo), small brush, contact solution (if you need it) deodorant, toothbrush, curling iron, concealer, mascara and a multiple blush/lip color/eye color like Tarte Cheek Stain or NARS Orgasm the Multiple. Also, clean underwear. Clean underwear is essential.
Everything, sans the curling iron, should fit in a gallon size Ziploc container or a medium-sized makeup bag.
Need sample sizes? Bed, Bath and Beyond in Chinatown has more travel-sized products than any store on Earth.
If you want to bring clothes to avoid that walk of shame look, buy a long-sleeved jersey dress that can roll up to fit in your purse. (I have one that I used to roll up and shove in the Ziploc bag mentioned above.) And pack a pair of thin flats or City Slips. That should at least get you home.
My advice, go to BB&B, pick up a medium-sized makeup bag, some travel sizes and an inexpensive curling iron or flat iron. They even have travel-sized irons for sale. Buy a purse big enough to haul it and call it good. Hopefully, in time, you’ll get a drawer.
Myself, I never waited for a drawer. I just hid my travel sized bag under the bathroom sink and never mentioned that it was there. No one ever noticed. And if someone did, he never said anything. I wasn’t “moving in” because if we’d broken up the next day, I wouldn’t have needed to go back for anything. But these were the things that made it possible for me to spontaneously spend the night without worry.