The Edition: No. 174
Jun 3, 2020
To refuse to listen to someone’s cries for justice and equality until the request comes in a language you feel comfortable with is a way of asserting your dominance over them in the situation. // Ijeoma Oluo, So You Want to Talk About Race
+ Your self-worth is not your net worth.
+ If you’re not sleeping, if you’ve been crying, if you need a rest, I recommend these eye gels. And good sunglasses, I wore mine inside today like a drummer in a rock band.
+ White women need to do more to confront racism and be anti-racist.
+ Loving the sage color and fun print of these Saltwater pajamas.
+ The future of the bra is up for debate in the pandemic.
+ This one from Wander the best new mascara on the market.
+ Should I wear a mask during a job interview?
+ This pineapple-print tunic dress and Emerson Fry caftan are perfect for summer.
+ The books black booksellers recommend you read.
+ Sale on sale at Shopbop. Don’t miss the shoe section (code June25).
+ Tips for post-Covid career success as we emerge from lockdown.
+ Love this Terranea beach hat and this affordable alternative.
+ How to make anything taste gourmet, and being a ‘hapless home cook’ in quarantine.
+ I don’t know how I lived without this fish spatula. Yes, a spatula.
+ “There is no simple story about looting.”
2020 is a particularly stressful time. Every week seems to present a new set of challenges. I’m struggling, and if you’re struggling too, consider BetterHelp online talk therapy.
I was intending to write a Saw It On Social about BetterHelp, but this feels like a good place to share my experience with BetterHelp. My counselor retired a year ago, and I’ve been without a professional to talk to since. And this is not the time to be without your mental health lifeline. So I decided to give BetterHelp a try because I think they’re advertising on most of the podcasts that I listen to.
The first counselor I worked with wasn’t a good fit, and I was grateful for a quick shift to one who was a better fit. Being able to send messages when I need to is nice. Turnaround time isn’t immediate, but it’s reasonably quick. And the cost is cheaper than my previous therapist at under $70 per week.
BetterHelp may not be a longterm solution, but it works in a pinch. Having someone to talk to keeps the daily stresses from becoming overwhelming. And couldn’t we all use a little of that right now?
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I remember the first time I heard the phrase white women benefit from the white supremacy and it sent a tremor through my body and my skin prickled with it’s absolute TRUENESS. I’ve spent the last few days reading and reading and reading, trying to figure out what I can do right now to be more anti-racist, all the resources and perspectives being offered are amazing and so helpful. I can see behind me all the times I got the benefit of the doubt, how easy it was for me to camouflage my past in a way that allowed me to succeed, like changing my clothes, I went from undesirable citizen to successful citizen. Did I have to work to get there, yes. But work wouldn’t have been enough for a person of color – did you know that the job interview callback rate for black applicants WITH NO criminal record is LESS THAN the callback rate of a white applicants WITH a criminal record. (14% vs 17%). We have to educate ourselves so that we can use our privilege to change the system. Thanks for sharing some great resources.
Hey Belle, how was your election? Thanks for your presence during all this.
Lost em both. One was a large candidate field in an open primary, so it was somewhat expected. The other was a total stunner and the whole state is talking about it. But I’m still proud of the races they ran and the work they did. Not sure I will work for anyone else this cycle though, I’m not as excited about the other choices.
Thank you for the way you’re using your voice and your perspective. It’s deeply appreciated, at least by me.
Also, while it seems like such a silly thing to focus on right now….I have been looking for good long-sleeve pajamas with shorts for SO. LONG. Incredibly happy to see this Saltwater pair.