Faux Pas: Jersey and Satin Don't Mix

Jul 12, 2010

For those of you who are new to the blog, famewhore and alleged-journalist Julia Allison is the unofficial CHS Faux Pas mascot.  Basically, she’s a fashion war criminal.  Past atrocities and crimes against humanity include, but are not limited to, dressing like Elvira for a formal event, wearing Moonboots and Juicy velour, and being the Empress of the slutty Halloween costume.

This week, Miss Allison illustrates how not to dress for an evening on the town by mixing an Alice + Olivia jersey dress with a pair of satin Manolos. 

The dress is actually cute, but without fail, Allison ruins the look by pairing it with the worst shoe choice possible.  You cannot wear crystal encrusted, satin Manolos with a jersey dress.  Because instead of looking chic, you look like a sartorial name dropper who wanted everyone to see that you can afford $800 shoes.  Proving that money is no substitute for actual style, and making Allison look like an incurable poseur.

So what shoes should she have worn?  Well, for a dinner out with friends, she could have worn a flat, Gladiator sandal.  However, if she was looking for something a little dressier, I would recommend either these nude suede sandals or these black t-strap heels.  With a dress that is this fabric and shape, you need something relaxed and edgy, not prissy and sparkly.

This concludes the fashion lesson of the day.  Thank you again to Julia Allison for being a shining example of what not to wear.

P.S. It also looks like Allison, 29, is once again rocking the Botox.  This actually makes me feel a little bit sorry for her.  How terrible it must be to feel so uncomfortable in your own skin that you need to inject poison into your body before the age of 30.

I quote Nora Ephron, “The things that you hate about your body at 30, you will be nostalgic for at 50.”  That’s an excellent point.  I may not absolutely adore everything about my body (acne) but, I am secure enough with who I am to know that that tiny wrinkle in my forehead does not define me as a person or require drastic measures, like Botox.

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  1. Daily reader says:

    Grammar edit: “New” [not “knew”] in the first sentence. Love your blog, Belle!

  2. Daily reader says:

    And “she’s” rather than “she’d” a fashion war criminal

  3. Dr. Jean Grey says:

    I don’t know how you can tell from that far-away photo whether she has Botox or not. I don’t mind you criticizing someone, but this post seems needlessly catty.

  4. B says:

    one more Belle… by mixing “an” [not and] Alice….

  5. Belle says:

    Dr-

    There was a remark on her blog that she was having some botox, and some other photos.

    And I wasn’t trying to be catty, I genuinely think it’s sad that she thinks she peaked at 28 years old. Or as she would say, she “as a woman” had “an expiration date.” It’s too bad, cause she’s pretty, she just doesn’t believe that.

  6. Belle says:

    Daily Reader-My poor grammar is really about my laziness more than my lack of proper instruction on the subject. So feel free to correct if you see mistakes. I often write these posts late at night when homonyms really become a problem for me.

  7. annie says:

    this just seems excessively hateful. you say you weren’t trying to be catty? the comments about the outfit are fine, albeit a bit snarkier than necessary perhaps. but the comments about her botox make you sound completely insecure. and for the record, it’s polite to link if you take someone’s pictures from their blog.

  8. Belle says:

    If you click on the photo, it takes you to the site where the picture came from.

    Snark is the lifeblood of this blog. I’ve said it before, and I will say it again, if you would prefer not to read pieces like this, you are welcome to read another blog. There are many excellent choices in the blogroll to the left.

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